Then Rishihanand Swami asked, what kind of thoughts arise in one who has a deficiency in their conviction in God?
Then Shriji Maharaj said, when one has a deficiency in their conviction, when they see some power in God, the topic of conviction is going on, Maharaj.
Then Shriji Maharaj said, one who has a deficiency in their conviction, when they see some power in God, they feel immense joy. And when they don't see power, their inner self becomes dim. And when evil thoughts arise in their heart and they try to remove them but cannot, then they find fault in God, thinking, 'I have been doing satsang for so many days and have died doing it, yet God does not remove my evil thoughts.'
We have served for 40 years, but nothing good has happened to us.
Someone might have done it for 50 years, 40 years, or 30 years, but still, nothing good happened to us.
So what does that show?
Hey, what does it show?
There is a deficiency in conviction.
Is God not capable of making things green, or what does it show?
He hasn't done anything like that.
He hasn't done anything that would make it green.
He hasn't done anything that would make it green. He doesn't have faith in God. He hasn't recognized God as He is.
In reality, he hasn't even recognized God's work, what God's work is supposed to be.
And he put those pills of Ginga in his nose and smelled them. He hasn't even gotten the fragrance of God's work.
So why would he say that he smelled roses?
How did he say that?
He says that it smells bad itself.
That's what he feels.
So, to know God, one must abandon their own desires and develop a curiosity about what God wants to say and what God wants them to do. If they do that, the dirt and impurities within them will be removed. Otherwise, everyone will complain, 'I have served for so many years,' or 'I have observed these vows for so many years,' or 'I have done this,' but still, the dirt within them has not been removed.
He asks, what is the deficiency?
The deficiency is his own, but he blames Maharaj, saying, 'Maharaj didn't do anything for me.'
Maharaj didn't do anything for me.
So, Maharaj wouldn't do it, or he didn't do anything for Maharaj?
Do we come here so that Maharaj can do our work, or do we come to do something for Maharaj?
What did I do?
We are Maharaj's.
Brother, you became a sadhu, so why did you come?
Did you come to take something from Maharaj or to give something?
Huh?
What did you come to do?
If you are fresh now, you might have forgotten all this.
Heh?
Came to give.
Have you come to offer service or to receive service?
The fresh ones know, but the old ones might have forgotten.
We
We have come to do something for Maharaj. Maharaj will probably do more than us.
But what did we do for Maharaj?
Nothing like that. Maharaj didn't do anything good for me.
No one would say that to Maharaj.
But he tells the sadhus, 'Tell me, how many years have I served him, but nothing good has happened to me.'
What is the problem with that?
Huh?
He hasn't recognized Maharaj.
There is a problem with conviction.
There is a problem with his recognition.
More than recognizing the person, he hasn't recognized his work.
Maharaj's work is this satsang, but he hasn't recognized satsang, what is in satsang.
It's there.
Heh?
It's there, what capacity is there?
And he hasn't done anything properly, he hasn't gotten anything properly in his hands.
And so he remains worried, thinking that he has done donkey's work.
If a donkey works, it doesn't get any benefit.
He has to work all day, getting beaten, and then he's thrown out in the evening after being beaten.
Then he comes back crying and in the morning, he has to come back, holding his ears, and be yoked again.
So, he did donkey's work, and nothing happened to him. He never got any food.
Does a donkey get food?
And if he came just to eat, then he wouldn't get it.
If he came just to eat, he wouldn't get it.
If he had decided beforehand that he would eat here, then he would eat now.
And the children and the wife are eating the flatbreads.
So he says that now these flatbreads will stop, and we will get food.
Then he will only get flatbreads.
That's what happens.
Maharaj says there is a deficiency in conviction.
There is a deficiency in the conviction he made, and he blames God.
He thinks, 'Why didn't God remove my thoughts?' That's what came up.
What came up?
Read it.
And when evil thoughts arise in one's heart and they try to remove them but cannot, then they find fault in God, thinking, 'I have been doing satsang for so many days and have died doing it, yet God does not remove my evil thoughts.'
Is it in his own hands to remove those evil thoughts, or is it in Maharaj's hands?
It's worth thinking about.
What does he say?
What does he say to Sadguru Saheb?
He himself removes the thoughts.
But if it is removed, is it removed by me, by Maharaj, or by himself?
He can remove the thoughts himself.
God removes them. He himself removes them, but he hasn't worked hard after recognizing God.
And he hasn't become worthy of God's grace, yet he desires the fruit of grace.
If God bestows grace, there must be some qualification for it, right?
That if he does this, it's a qualification.
If he has done what he wanted, and then says that God did not do his work.
So there is a qualification.
Of grace.
God removes his thoughts, and it is certainly by God's grace that they are removed.
But he has to do something to receive His grace.
He should have the qualification to receive His grace.
Then God will remove it.
But everyone blames God, saying God did not remove their troubles.
He removed others' troubles, even those who were nearby, but not mine.
So God is like this.
Like me.
So God is very good.
No.
No.
I am very good, so I met God, but God could not take any benefit from me.
All this.
What is this trouble about?
There is a deficiency in the conviction of recognition.
It's not of conviction. His conviction is weak.
His recognition is weak. Conviction means recognition comes first, then conviction, right?
So.
That's what needs to be found out.
That's there, right?
Daharosmin Antarakasha.
Tasmin Yadantah.
Tad Anveshtavyam Jijnasitavyam Nidhidhyasitavyam.
Tasminyo Yadantah, what is inside it.
So.
What's inside it?
Auspicious qualities.
Auspicious qualities, meaning where?
So he says.
Subtlety.
Greatness.
Grandeur.
All of that resides within this human form, this five-hand murti.
It resides within it.
Maharaj says that even if he knows it well, why doesn't it happen like that?
He says it's like seeing a pillar in the dark.
That divine quality should be revealed.
If it is revealed like that.
Then he is said to have known it, and he is said to have made a firm resolve.
Let's keep it now.
Victory to Sahajanand Swami Maharaj.